Archive for the 'Relationships' Category

Getting to know you… getting to know all about you. The couples edition.

I was reading dooce last night where  she completed this meme. So I decided to be a copy cat and answer these questions for the husband & myself. Please to enjoy!

What are your middle names?
My middle name is Duplan ~ funny name you say? Well, it wasn’t always my middle name. Originally -at birth- my mother & father gave me a lovely middle name Leigh, in case you were wondering, and when we got married I changed my maiden name to my middle name. Rob’s middle name is Arthur. And it is his father’s middle name & it was his grandfather’s middle name & his great grandfather’s middle name. Since we didn’t have a boy child we couldn’t carry on this little tradition. Although, I guess we could have given one of the gremlins Arthur as a middle name. Added some fodder for the psych appointments.

How long have you been together?
We’ve been married thirteen and a half years, together over 18 years. Yep, that’s half my lifetime.

How long did you know each other before you started dating?
Roughly two weeks, I’d say.

Who asked whom out?
He asked me for my phone number then called me the next day.

How old are each of you?
We’re both 38, he’s 19 days older than me. Which I like to throw in his face every time he tells me I’m old.

Whose siblings do you see the most?
Mine since Rob doesn’t have any siblings.

Which situation is the hardest on you as a couple?
I think the thing that causes the most difficulty is the children. WTH were we thinking having kids?! No, I’m kidding! But honestly, we have very differing parenting styles and I think this is one of our biggest challenges.

Did you go to the same school?
Nope. He went to school in one city & I went to school in another city.

Are you from the same home town?
No. I think I made it fairly obvious with my answer to the last question.

Who is smarter?
I’m not sure. We share a brain these days so it’s 6 of one / half dozen of another. I’d have to say that he is definitely smarter in some areas & I’m smarter in others. Together we know a lot of useless information.

Who is the most sensitive?
Oooooh, that would be me.

Where do you eat out most as a couple?
Almost every restaurant that we go to we can take the gremlins but if we’re going to eat out just the two of us, then I suppose it would be La Fondue.

Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?

Who has the craziest exes?
Well we’ve been together for so dang long that we never had a chance to accumulate a bunch of crazy exes.

Who has the worst temper?
That would be Rob.

Who does the cooking?
Me, that is when I’m not being persuaded to go out to eat -yet again- by Rob & the gremlins. I try to cook, I suggest things but since I’m not a short order cook & can’t make what each individual wants to eat for dinner on that given night, the restaurant ALWAYS wins.

Who is the neat-freak?
Freak? Don’t call me a freak. Just cause I like to have things tidy doesn’t make me a freak!

Who is more stubborn?
Um, this is a tie. We are both extremely stubborn. And now we have two ridiculously stubborn children to add to the stubbornness mix.

Who hogs the bed?
With a King sized bed there is plenty of room for two or four people. Before you go all, “oohhhh, who else do you have in your bed?!” I’m referring to those two stubborn children.

Who wakes up earlier?
Hahahahahaha. Me. Cause Pumpkin comes into our bedroom, walks straight up to my side of the bed and in not so hushed tones tells me to get up & make her some breakfast. This usually occurs at some point between the hours of  5-6am EVERY DAMN day of the week. Yes, even on Saturday & Sunday.

Where was your first date?
Movie theater

Who is more jealous?
Probably me. Thank the stars above that I have nothing to be jealous about.

How long did it take to get serious?
We were serious almost right away. Pretty much within a month and a half we were dating exclusively.

Who eats more?
Rob does. Now. But there was a couple times ~when I was preggers~ that I could out eat him.

Who does the laundry?
Let’s see… hmmm…. d’oh, that’s right, I do. All the laundry. All the time.

Who’s better with the computer?
Hands down, Rob. He had one of those first personal computers that was the size of a baby elephant – well not really- but close and my first computer was one he got for me when he worked at Apple. So he’s had years more experience with computers & it has always been the field he’s worked in.

Who drives when you are together?
It’s a toss up. If it’s my car, then I usually drive. If it’s his car, then he drives. Although lately I’ve been having him drive for me. Laziness? Sorta.

If you’d like to participate in this stolen meme, then copy & paste into your own blog, email, facebook, myspace, whathaveyou, and answer the questions. Add your link in the comment section so I know & can read all about you.


Wait, what? It’s my anniversary today?

You know it’s bad when you are the WIFE and you forget your anniversary!  Not that I forgot it entirely, you see.  I just forgot this morning.  In our usual mad rush to get breakfast in the gremlin’s tummies, get them clothed, shoed, hair/teeth brushed, we both completely forgot to say Happy Anniversary to each other… and not even a small kiss goodbye as the husband rushed out the door.  That’s bad, huh?

It’s our 13th wedding anniversary.  I don’t have a thing about the number 13 so its just another year to me.  What shocks me, is that it has gone by faster than I ever could have imagined.

Here is where I try to explain away my forgetting of the anniversary:

  1. It’s a Tuesday, for Pete’s sake
  2. It’s been 13 years
  3. I’m thinking about the upcoming 4th of July weekend – Parade, BBQ, fireworks and that’s just on Fri., Sat we are going to a BBQ at my mom’s and I’m supposed to walk 14 miles, oh yeah & 10 miles on Sun.  
  4. I have two gremlins that I have to deal with – e.g. MOM she’s bugging me, tell her to get her feet out of my face!  She pushed me.
  5. We are going to Las Vegas in two weeks to celebrate our anniversary – WHOOOOHOOOOO!
  6. I have work I’m supposed to be doing – yawn
  7. I’ve been trying to finish a couple blog posts that are dragging on – well actually I think I have ADD which has been keeping me for getting anything done
  8. There’s a giant nail in the front tire of my brand new set of tires – DAMN IT
  9. My two dogs need to be groomed so badly that my miniature schnauzer looks like a muppet
  10. I’m almost done with the sixth book in the Stephanie Plum series by Janet Evanovich
  11. I need to walk 4 miles today
  12. Have customers I need to see today
  13. Don’t know what all I’m making for dinner tonight

So there, as it turns out, 13 reasons why I forgot.

But on a positive note, I got a nice bouqet of flowers delivered today from the husband!  Well, technically it’s my Christmas present, a year’s worth of flowers delivered monthly, but hey it also happens to be my anniversary so I’ll just say it’s for my anniversary and be done with it.

Enough for now,


More Quotes

OK, more quotes that I find interesting.  Still too busy to think for myself and write a post about something or anything of real import.  Although, I can blame part of it on the fact that I got a new laptop to replace my home & work computer so I’ve spent the last 4 days trying to reload all my programs, files, etc.  It’s crazy how long that stuff takes.  Really, it’s difficult enough trying to reload items from a single computer, imagine doing twice as much.

Anyhoozlebee, hopefully you’ll find one or two of these quotes thought provoking.

Fortune does not change men, it unmasks them.
– Suzanne Necker

The highest courage is to dare to appear to be what one is.
– John Lancaster Spalding

It is how people respond to stress that determines whether they will profit from misfortune or be miserable.
– Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience, 1990

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one.
– Leo J. Burke

Some are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but it is love just the same.
– Pearl Buck, quoted in O Magazine, May 2003 US novelist in China (1892 – 1973)

The human brain is unique in that it is the only container of which it can be said that the more you put into it, the more it will hold.
– Glenn Doman

The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.
– Walter Bagehot

If you don’t accept responsibility for your own actions, then you are forever chained to a position of defense.
– Holly Lisle, Fire In The Mist, 1992

What’s the use of worrying? It never was worthwhile.
– George Asaf

A discovery is said to be an accident meeting a prepared mind. 
– Albert Szent-Gyorgyi US (Hungarian-born) biochemist (1893 – 1986)

To acquire knowledge, one must study; but to acquire wisdom, one must observe.
– Marilyn vos Savant

Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
– Benjamin Franklin US author, diplomat, inventor, physicist, politician, & printer (1706 – 1790)

If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must Man be of learning from experience.
– George Bernard Shaw

I think when I work 14 hours a day, seven days a week, I get lucky.
– Armand Hammer US industrialist & philanthropist (1898 – 1990)

Each new day presents an opportunity to start all over again, to cleanse our minds and our hearts anew, and to clarify our vision.
– Mary Kay Ash

There are two ways of exerting one’s strength: one is pushing down, the other is pulling up.
– Booker T. Washington US educator (1856 – 1915)

We cannot control the evil tongues of others; but a good life enables us to disregard them.
– Cato the Elder Roman orator & politician (234 BC – 149 BC)

Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not.
– Oprah Winfrey, in Good Housekeeping US actress & television talk show host (1954 – )

Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.
– C. S. Lewis English essayist & juvenile novelist (1898 – 1963)

Say not, when I have leisure I will study; you may not have leisure.
– The Mishnah

A certain amount of opposition is a great help to a man; it is what he wants and must have to be good for anything. Hardship and opposition are the native soil of manhood and self-reliance.
– John Neal

Most powerful is he who has himself in his own power.
– Seneca Roman dramatist, philosopher, & politician (5 BC – 65 AD)

Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
– George Bernard Shaw

Sometimes I wish…

That I only needed 5 4 3 hrs of sleep per night.  Oh, and I would be completely refreshed, ready to take on whatever the day had in store.  If this wish were to come true, I would have enough time to do everything that I wanted to do.  I was contemplating this, the other night, as I was falling asleep.  I had so wanted to spend more time writing but I knew that I needed to get to bed at a decent hour ~ decent hour being something like 11:00pm ~ and how this would be absolutely necessary for me to have enough energy for the next day (or everyday for that matter).  I am perpetually facing this limitation, not enough hours in the day….  Certainly I’m not the only one that feels this way.  But we’re not talking about them, we’re talking about me.  So, there. 

Now, if I only needed 5 4 3 hrs to rest each night, then I would be able to do the following (in no particular order):

  • read,
  • watch t.v.,
  • exercise,
  • listen to music,
  • check my emails,
  • travel,
  • read blogs,
  • scrapbook,
  • volunteer,
  • write blogs,
  • chat with friends,
  • mess with myspace,
  • talk to my husband ~in more words than “ah uh, yeah, ok, whatever, no, did you, sure”.  I would love to speak in whole sentences about important world topics or our life & future together or our children, 
  • write more of my book,
  • journal,
  • give blood,
  • play /read with my children,
  • and so on. 

Not having 21 hrs to do all of the above (and more) means that I have to be really selective.  No time wasting for me.  And even still I have to choose wisely between what has to be done & what I want to do.  It just doesn’t add up.  If only I could be selfish and do the things I want to do.  I would say “screw you” to all the work, chores, homework (now that we have started back to school) and other responsibilities that must come before the fun stuff.  I suppose if I had the extra time, then I wouldn’t have to say “screw you”, I could just do everything!

So, I’ll say it again, sometimes I wish that I only needed 3 hrs of sleep.  Imagine all the wonderful things that I would be able to do!  Aaahhhh, what a delightful thought.

Enough for now (cause I have to go to bed),


Our Anniversary (part 2)

So we are back from our trip to Las Vegas with MUCH lighter pockets.  Oh well, the cost of entertainment.  It is nice to win on occasion or every time, but how likely is that?  We are certainly not professional gamblers, this would (of course) increase our chances of winning more consistantly.  But as I said, it’s the cost of entertainment.

On this trip we stayed at the Wynn.  *BEAUTIFUL* hotel.  If you’ve never heard of it or seen it, then go here Wynn Las Vegas.  Our room was definitely more than I was expecting.  Marble floors in the bathroom, seperate shower & tub with a waterfall spout.  Huge room with King size bed and the most comfortable linens.  In fact, I am thinking of switching our old style matchy matchy comforter, sheets, pillow shams for something like the simplicity of their set.  (BTW, you can purchase almost everything they had in their rooms ~ there was a price list!)  FLAT panel television with wireless keyboard.   Lovely damask couch with a matching ottoman.  A stylish table and chair set plus a really nice desk.  Avant garde art.  The view was decent.  We were looking at some of the other hotels on the strip as opposed to the swimming pool but not that big a deal. 

On our first night in town we had a wonderful dinner at the SW Steakhouse in the Wynn.  I LOVE Las Vegas in the summer!!  I know most people will think I’m insane since the weather is roughly 108-110 degrees during the day but at night it’s some what closer to 80-85 degrees.  Perfect!  The restaurant was partially open to a waterfall/lake and we were eating right at the edge of the indoor/outdoor area.  The best of both worlds.  Air conditioning and natural air where we could enjoy the nice warm weather of the early evening and still feel some cooler temps from inside.  Our table faced the waterfall and we could still observe others enjoying their dinner.  I do find pleasure in observing other people.  It always makes me wonder what their lives are like.  What do they do, where do they live, how do they live, do they have children / grandchildren?  

So, on that note, I swear to you we had dinner with the Soprano.  I’ll explain.  They obviously weren’t the people from the show but real people who were like those on the show.  They were seated at the table adjacent to ours.  Thereby affording us a chance to observe without being obvious.   

(Writer’s note: Sorry about the delay.  Been gone a few days and just got back from a family member’s wedding AND had no internet or working computer.  See Damn computers, damn internet.)

Back to the Sopranos.  There were about 7 people, 2 ladies & 5 guys.  The thing that made us think they were like the Sopranos, was how they looked.  The ladies were all done up with lots of gold jewelery ~rings, earrings, necklaces~ and the guys were all dressed in black.  Seriously.  Plus, they smoked during dinner!  Sure, we were in Las Vegas and everyone smokes there.  But during dinner is a bit much these days.  Luckily with our table being situated as it was, the stench of the cigarettes didn’t bother us too much.          

Our food was fabulous.  Filet Mignon served with the most incredible sauces.  There was this jalapeno mango sauce, hollandaise ~of course~, and another sauce that I’ve completely forgotten.  The dessert was sublime.  Lots of chocolate with coffee ice cream (a big favorite of mine).  Plus, the staff took the time to write Happy Anniversary in chocolate sauce on the platter!  Lets all say it together, Aaaahhhh.  It was a nice touch, though.  Needless to say, we stuffed ourselves.

OK, so I’m skipping all the boring details of where we gambled and how much we lost (truthfully, I don’t want to relive the sad, sad parting of my money from my wallet) and I’ll move on to the next day… we woke up when we felt like it!  No *screaming* from a 2 yr old on this morning, no sir.  No 7 yr old standing over me, staring down at me, willing me to wake up.  Just pure peace and quiet.  My wonderful husband went down and got me a latte and bagel.  I ate 1/2 the bagel & he ate a breakfast sandwich ~this will be important to know for later in the story.

We decided to head over to the Rio where they were holding a series of WSOP tournaments.  Yes, we saw a bunch of pro-poker players… can you say Phil Laak, Jennifer Tilly, Gavin Smith, Isabelle Mercier.  Pretty cool.  From there we went to one of our favorite places to gamble, Casino Royale.  Sure its old and hasn’t ever been remodeled but the games are cheap & fun.  We played on a $3 craps table for, and I’m not exaggerating, 4 straight hours.  (Note: Here’s where it’s important to know what we ate for breakfast).  We played from 1:00pm to 5:00pm.  No stopping for lunch, just keep on playing.  Little did I know that the husband was consuming many, many, many beers during this time frame.  I realized how WASTED he was when we attempted to walk back to the hotel.  I lost count of the number of times he stumbled into me.  When we got to the room he immediately fell onto the bed.  Now, I’m a realist (some of the time) and what I realized about this situation is that he was going to pass out and/or vomit fairly quickly. 

So, I did my best to try to motivate him to eat something, take a shower, keep moving, do anything that might keep him from becoming comatose.  Well, in a nutshell, I failed.  He passed out on the bed.  Then suddenly woke up and went to the bathroom.  I waited, and waited, and waited for the upchucking to begin, but heard no sound ~ just absolute silence.  This began to worry me.  What the hell happened?  Did he leave the room?!  No, oh no, he was in the bathroom all right.  Just passed out on the floor.  HELLO??!!  Are you dead down there?! 

Well, I am happy to report that he was not dead on the bathroom floor.  And he did eventually make it back to the bed.  No vomitting.  Thank goodness.  Around 2 1/2 hrs later I managed to roust him.  We made it down to dinner, finally.  He got some food in his stomach and it revived him. 

We went down to Fremont Street and lost more money.  BTW, we really didn’t have the money to lose in the first place but oh well, you only live once, right?!  And as I’ve said before, it’s the cost of entertaiment.  BLAH!

I will say one final thing, we left on Saturday as opposed to Sunday (which is when we usually fly home) and there was NO line at the baggage drop-off, NO line at the ID check point, and NO line at the security check point!  BRILLIANT!  I think we will plan all our future trips so that we leave on Sat.

All right, I’d say that’s about enough for now,


Our Anniversary

In roughly three weeks it will be our 12th wedding anniversary.  That’s a long time.  We’ve, technically, been together longer.  If you count the 5ish years we were together before getting married.  Which I do.  You know, time served and all that.  So really, it’s like our 17th anniversary.  Ok, that thought is kinda frightening.  How quickly time goes by….

Now, what this post is really about, besides our anniversary, is that we are going to Las Vegas to celebrate!!!  I can hardly wait to go.  I’d like to leave now if at all possible and not come back for about two weeks.  Alas, that is not possible.  We’ve got children.  They’re staying with my in-laws.  Of course the kids & the in-laws are thrilled about the arrangement.  My in-laws love to spoil our kids rotten.  These days, I realize the full meaning of that expression, because when the kids come back from staying with their grandparents, they are completely out of control.  We hear a lot of this, ‘but Nana lets me do that’ and ‘I want ice cream’ and ‘I want to go back to Nana’s’.  Everything is always better at Nana’s house.  This is why people constantly say they want to skip the whole raising children part and go straight to having grandchildren.  We’ve told our 7yr old that when she has kids, we are going to spoil them to pieces and give them everything they want whenever they want it so she will know what it was like for us.  HAHAHAHA! Payback, baby.

Anyhoo, we are gettin outta here and going to Sin City.  And I’m absolutely confident that we will be committing multiple sins.  YEAH!  We’re going to *Hell* anyway, so we might as well have a good time.

It’s the getting ready to leave for a trip that I don’t particularly enjoy.  All the miscellaneous things that have to be done before you can go.  Including laundry.  Because inevitably one of the shirts you want to take with ~ needs to be washed.  Plus, there’s the last minute run to the grocery store to get pull-ups for the 2yr old and food for the dogs and so on.

But what keeps me going despite my physical exhaustion is the thought that I AM GOING TO LAS VEGAS!!  I have almost three days alone with my husband, I can sleep as late as I want or stay out as late as I want, play some craps & blackjack & pai gow & video poker.  Do we like to gamble, ummm, let me think for a sec, YES!  Not to mention all the “FREE” drinks that we’ll be getting.  

We have plans to go out to a nice dinner, maybe go to a club for some dancing, and of course gamble some more.  I’ll reiterate, I can’t wait to go!!  (Question: Am I using excessive exclaimation marks for this post?  Oh, well I don’t care!!!!!) 

Well, wish us luck! 

Enough for now,


I have an opinion about…

Myspace. I love it! I love the fact that you can find people. I’ve found old high school friends, current friends, FAMILY (who knew that my cousins from GA were on myspace?!) well I do now! My cousin’s wife found my sister who then told her about me. So then I find out that my cousin (as in the husband to the wife that found my sister) and his sister are also on myspace. Now we have a chance to chat easier and more than ever before. I read a blog the other day about a guy whose ‘long lost cousin’ found him. See how its bringing families back together? HA, love it.

Ok, so my husband has a *real* opinion about myspace. He doesn’t like it. “It’s for teenagers and people in their early 20’s, no one older than that is on it”, he says. “I’m sure all the statistics will show that the majority of people who are on it are all in that age range”. Well I can say, from my personal experience, that the searches for classmates show there are lots of people from lots of age groups on myspace. I wish I knew the stats, and I’m sure there is someplace to find out what said stats are, but I haven’t taken the time to do the research. I attempt to explain all this to him but see the “I’m not even pretendingto listen to you” look on his face. Fine, whatever. (Dehh, mini two yr old tantrum) You can have your opinion and I can have mine. This is how we generally settle a large percentage of disagreements (read: arguments).

There is the thing about myspace being just slightly addictive. I know everyone will agree that it is a black hole of time.When you log in it may be XYZ hour and then 52 hours later you realize that you better log off and go to bed or back to work or take the kids to school or whatever you probably should have been doing in the first place. But during those 52 hours it’s a blast sending messages and bulletins to friends, searching for people, or searching for some cute graphic to add on to those messages and bulletins.

Another thing that I love; all the options for design and personalization. How much fun is it to be able to select colors and schemes and music all in an effort to show the world who you are or what you’re about. Look at me, look at ‘my space’, I’m really cool can’t you tell from this page I created?! Lets not forget about the videos, both movie and music variety, that you can add on.

All right, I think that’s enough for now.


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